Change vs. Excuses: What's Your Choice?
By: Anita Web Weaver
"People underestimate their capacity for change. There is never a right time to do a difficult thing." - John Porter
So often people have a litany of reasons why they can't or won't start the process of finding their dream career. Here are some of the more common ones:
- It's not the right time.
- My kids are too young.
- I don't have enough time now. How would I ever find the time to do the research necessary to find my dream career?
- I've only got 10 more years 'till retirement; I'll do it then.
- My job's not so bad. I'll stick it out.
- The economy is too bad; it's not a good time to be looking.
You get the idea. What's really going on is that people are scared. They know they will have to step out of their comfort zone; they may have to learn a new skill; they fear people may respond skeptically to their new direction.
Frankly, it's easy to find excuses to not challenge ourselves. It allows us to believe we have good reasons for not moving ahead.
But it's really fear talking. And if we allow fear to be the loudest voice in our head, then we will sink back into our comfortable routines, familiar jobs and safe surroundings. And we will never grow, change and become what life calls us to be.
These justifications can play a role even in small things. I remember a time when I wanted to write a feature article for a magazine. At the time my children were small and I kept telling myself that I would never find the 3 hours or so I needed to write my article.
But one day I just said, "I'm going to start this article today." I wrote for twenty minutes before being interrupted. It happened several more times, but by the end of the day I had a rough draft.
Over the next two days I edited the article and sent it off. It was published shortly afterward and I remember the sense of accomplishment I had for stopping the excuses. And note: I still met my responsibilities to my young children.
We may not always like change, but as the quote above says, we human beings have a huge capacity for change. What's unfortunate is that often that change has to be thrust upon us from external forces.
In the 1980's I worked with military personnel from a number of local bases that were being closed. After people got past the initial shock, anger and fear, they began to examine their talents, their values and their lives. Many of these people began working at the base right out of high school, like their parents, cousins and brothers did before them.
For the first time in their adult lives, they saw they could perhaps choose something different. I can't tell you how many people said, after uncovering their new career options, how glad they were that this change was forced upon them. They were thrilled with the new possibilities they were uncovering, but they also admitted that they would never have chosen, on their own, to leave the security of federal employment.
That's the thing. Familiarity wraps us in a safe cocoon that we don't want to leave.
We're like babies in the womb or caterpillars in our safe cocoons. Of course we don't want to leave.
But what about the insistent voice that keeps calling us to be something more? What about those desires we've long held for something different? What about the longing we sometimes feel late at night before we go to bed.
That voice is important - and powerful. We human beings are not meant to stay at one level of development. We are meant to keep growing, changing and developing until we die.
If we ignore that voice, we may find that our lives will feel blah. We may be mildly depressed or angry a lot for no external reason. We may even develop vague physical symptoms like back ache, stress headaches, joint pain, heart palpitations and others.
Growth and full self-expression are critically important for us as human beings. Staying small is not fun.
Growing to our next level of creative endeavor through a dream career is fun and exciting. Yes, there's risk, but there's risk crossing the street.
If you are longing for a dream career that lets you make a meaningful contribution and you find yourself making the typical excuses, take another look.
Are these excuses real obstacles? Or do these excuses really mean you are afraid to move forward - to change?
You're the only one who can decide, but remember how great your capacity for change is. You can do it!
Author Resource:-> Anita Web Weaver is the owner of Design to Shine Consulting, offering coaching, mentoring and speaking services to help people shine, no matter what, in their career, their life and their health.
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